


Occupy My Every Sigh

by tess_genor



Category: Prodigal Son (TV 2019)
Genre: Confessions, Flirting, M/M, Photography
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-20
Updated: 2020-04-20
Packaged: 2021-03-01 23:41:30
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,614
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23755543
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/tess_genor/pseuds/tess_genor
Summary: Malcolm needs a model for his photography class and Gil volunteers. What starts off as an innocent photoshoot quickly turns into something a little more exciting.
Relationships: Gil Arroyo/Malcolm Bright
Comments: 10
Kudos: 54





	Occupy My Every Sigh

**Author's Note:**

> Inspired by the red LED's I have in my living room  
> Title from [Red Flags And Long Nights](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uMTRPMfGZTg) by She Wants Revenge

”Hey, kid, you ready to go out?” Gil asks while loosening his tie. The team has just finished a long day of closing paperwork for a case.

”Out?” Malcolm looks up from the computer screen.

”Bright, you’re killing me.” When Malcolm continues to stare at Gil in confusion, the older man sighs. “Our monthly dinner? It’s the first Tuesday of the month. We always go out if we’re both free...”

Ever since Jackie passed Malcolm tries to see Gil at least once a month. It started with phone calls, but eventually it progressed to visits. Malcolm would fly Gil out to DC for a weekend or he would drive into the city to surprise Gil. It was something both of them looked forward to so Gil can’t believe that Malcolm forgot.

”If you have other plans we can just pick another day, or skip this month. It’s alright. I see you a lot more often these days. We don’t have to keep it up.” Gil tries his best to hide the disappointment in his voice, but Malcolm can hear it clear as day.

”Gil, no way I want to cancel. I love making time for you. It’s just- Well, I finally took your advice.” Malcolm lets out a breathy chuckle. “I picked up a new hobby that doesn’t pose a potential threat to my well being.”

”No way? You, following direction? I’m shocked. Well, don’t hold out on me. What’s got you so swept up that you forgot about this old man?” Gil crosses his arms. While he can’t help but feel hurt, he is happy for Malcolm.

”I took up photography. I was able to enroll in an NYU class. It’s a twelve week course that meets on Tuesday nights.” Malcolm smiles sheepishly up at Gil.

”Ah so, you have class tonight.” Gil puts everything together with relative ease. Not that Malcolm’s story was especially difficult to follow.

”It’s three hours but we could grab food after?” Malcolm volunteers.

”The class ends at ten?” Gil’s mouth drops and Malcolm grimaces.

”Doesn’t bother me.” Malcolm shrugs.

”Right, insomnia.” Gil gives Malcolm an understanding smile. Malcolm nods and laughs. “Well, I’m usually in bed by then so I guess tonight's off the table.”

”Tomorrow then?” Malcolm knows how much Gil loves spending time with him and honestly, Malcolm loves the time as much as Gil does. “My treat. Let me make it up to you.”

”Tomorrow isn’t good for me, I’ve got my niece's birthday party. You always insist on treating, city boy.” Gil quirks an eyebrow at Malcolm.

”What’s the point of having money if I can’t shower my friends with expensive dinners?” Malcolm shuts off the computer and stands from the desk. “Next wednesday then, seven sharp. We are going out. You pick the place, wherever you want, and I’ll make the reservation.” Malcolm slings his messenger bag over his shoulder and Gil pulls him into a quick hug.

”I’ll text you once I think of somewhere.” Gil withdraws from the hug first. He playfully swats Malcolm on the back. “Now don’t be late to class, I don’t want to get a call from your teacher.” Gil beams at Malcolm. He’s happy the kid found something that can keep his interest _and_ can’t injure him.

”Professor Thompson has a very forgiving attendance policy.” Malcolm laughs and steps into the hallway. “Text me!” He shouts before the elevator doors close.

”You got it, ace.” Gil says to the empty air. He didn’t plan on immediately going home, and he isn’t looking forward to an empty house, but the hope of seeing Malcolm for dinner next week keeps him afloat. Besides, Gil will take any possible excuse to grab pizza.

\--------------------

Malcolm’s phone chimes, meaning that Gil is downstairs waiting in his car. The drive to the restaurant was quiet, but comfortable. The two see each other fairly often for work, so any stories that they would normally share, they both already know. Gil parks and gets out of the car first. He walks around and grabs Malcolm’s door for him.

”Why, thank you.” Malcolm comically bows his head and Gil bellows with laughter. “Aren’t you a perfect gentleman?”

”Well I had to brush up on my etiquette. It’s not every day I get to dine with New York royalty.” Gil jokes and earns himself a nudge from Malcolm.

”I’m the lucky one here.” Malcolm smiles and holds the restaurant door open for Gil. Gil ducks his head and walks up to the host stand.

”Two for Bright?” Gil blushes when the hostess raises an eyebrow. Malcolm may have changed his name, but money is money, and the name Bright still carries some weight.

”Follow me please.” She tucks two menus under her arm and leads the two men to a table in the back of the establishment. “Enjoy your meal.” The hostess says as she places the two menus down and turns on her heel to quickly leave.

The dinner goes off without a hitch. Gil and Malcolm fall back into old routines comfortably. Malcolm retells a story of how Gil’s kindness with him as a boy gave him an advantage on a FBI case with children involved. Gil tells a few stories about him and Jackie from college that have Malcolm questioning how Gil was able to join the academy in the first place. It’s not until Gil is halfway done with dessert that he finally asks about what has been nagging at him for just over a week.

”Out of everything in the world, how did you settle on photography?’ Gil asks with his mouth full of cheesecake.

”I was wondering when you were going to ask.” Malcolm laughs. “It gets me out of the house for starters. Plus, if I’m any good, I figure it’s a good way to personalize gifts.” Malcolm shrugs and signs the bill.

”I’m sure Jessica is already trying to get you into a gallery somewhere.” Gil finishes off his coffee. Malcolm is already on his feet pulling on his coat.

”Oh, totally, but there’s no way I’m letting her get her hands on my photos. I want to finish the course before I really show anyone.” Malcolm pops one of the mints that came with the check into his mouth.

”You always were a perfectionist. What’s the newest topic in class?” The conversation is natural. Gil is genuinely interested in what Malcolm has to say and for once in his life, Malcolm is happy to have something to talk about besides murder.

”Portraits actually. I have to take photos of someone else. Which is hard to do when you live alone. I was thinking of asking Ainsley, she’d be comfortable in front of the camera, but I don’t know. I feel bad always asking her.” Malcolm falls into the passenger seat of Gil’s car.

”Why don’t you ask someone else?” Gil asks nonchalantly. He turns the key in the ignition and grins. He loves the way the car rumbles to life. Even Malcolm smiles, Gil’s happiness is contagious.

”Yeah, alright I’ll just ask one of my many, _many_ friends.” Malcolm rolls his eyes. “I don’t know who else to ask.” He rests his head against the window. Who knew that a hobby would still make Malcolm feel lonely.

”I’m your friend. You can ask me.” Gil looks over at Malcolm earnestly.

”You want me to take your picture?” Malcolm scoffs. “You don’t strike me as the modeling type.” Gil puts the car into drive.

”There’s a ton you don’t know about me, kid.” Gil smirks and pulls away from the spot.

When they make it back to Malcolm’s apartment, Gil shocks the younger man by shutting the car off once he’s parked at the curb. Malcolm throws Gil a questioning glance, but Gil just winks and gets out of the car. Malcolm, still sluggish from the heavy food, fumbles with his seatbelt before meeting Gil at the front door.

”You have your own key- why not let yourself in?” Malcolm teases Gil, pushing past him to unlock his door.

”Well I thought it would be rude for the model to take charge of the shoot, so..” Gil messes with Malcolm’s hair. “Come on, city boy. It’s time for my big break.”

”Glad to see this won’t go to your head.” Malcolm takes off his jacket and runs over to the staircase. “Give me a few minutes to get set up? You know your way around, take whatever you want.” With that Malcolm takes the steps two at a time, rushing to grab his camera from his office.

Gil leaves his sport jacket on and moves around the kitchen. He pours himself a glass of water and downs it easily. His pulse picks up and he can feel his hands start to jitter. _Maybe the coffee was a bad idea_ , he thinks. Gil forces himself to relax and reclines on the leather couch. He is so lost in his own thoughts that he doesn’t even notice that Malcolm has rejoined him. It’s not until the distinctive _click_ of the camera shutter that Gil turns his head and notices Malcolm smiling at him.

Malcolm is fairly close to Gil, the camera only a couple of feet away from Gil’s face. Gil can already imagine what Malcolm was going for: Gil laying back, relaxed on the sofa. His eyes not quite focused on what’s in front of him. The contrast of the smooth back of the sofa in the lower half of the frame and Gil’s side profile against the rows of weapons on the upper half.

”Didn’t hear you come back down.” Gil shifts and takes his feet off of the couch, blushing as he does.

”That’s alright, I didn’t want you to. I like that it’s more candid.” Malcolm says softly. He sits on the back of the couch and angles his body so that he is poised, cantilevered over Gil’s stomach.

Malcolm continues to play with his center of gravity. Inching to the left or the right, throwing his foot out to keep his balance as he leans backwards. Gil laughs as Malcolm rocks forward in a futile, last minute attempt to catch himself from falling. Malcolm ends up landing on Gil’s lap and Gil groans with the added weight. His groan turns into hearty laughter.

_click_

Gil opens his eyes and stops laughing at the sound of the camera. Malcolm rolls his eyes. He knows that the picture is probably blurry, but Malcolm loves seeing Gil laugh. Even if the picture isn’t the best quality Malcolm is going to treasure it. He wants to have a keepsake of Gil laughing and happy forever. A moment frozen in time when both of them had no worries in the world and were allowed to feel light.

”Oh! I still have the bottle of scotch you liked. I’ll pour some.” Malcolm tucks his legs under him. Knees bracing either side of Gil’s hips.

”I’m taking you don’t drink it without me?” Gil questions. Malcolm nods in return.

”I don’t have anyone else to drink it with. Not that I’d want to share it with someone else anyway. You’re great company.” Malcolm places the neck strap of the camera over his head. The camera swings, hitting into Malcolm’s chest a few times before it settles.

”You’re not too bad yourself.” Gil smirks up at Malcolm.

He raises his hands and tucks them under his head. Malcolm knows that Gil feels at home in his apartment. Gil made sure that Malcolm always saw his house as a safe space for Malcolm, and Malcolm is happy that he can offer the same thing to Gil. Gil settles into a more comfortable dip in the couch and sighs. He looks up at Malcolm, leaning over the back of the couch, Gil’s deep brown eyes gazing at him through the viewfinder.

_click_

”I was promised a drink.” Gil complains, only half meaning it. Malcolm laughs and touches the tip of Gil’s nose with his pointer finger.

”And you promised to be my model.” Malcolm slips off the sofa and pads over to the liquor cabinet.

”Model? I’m not even your muse, what a shame.” Gil stands and shakes his head in disbelief. He heads into the kitchen to grab two of the fancy crystal tumblers that Malcolm insists on using.

Malcolm joins Gil in the kitchen and sets the bottle down on the island next to the glasses. Gil pours the drinks for the both of them. They bring the two glasses together and toast to Jackie and to the team. Malcolm twists his mouth into a smile.

”To my muse.” He lifts the glass up high and finishes nearly all of it in one swallow.

”So I _am_ your muse now?” Gil sets his glass down and plops into one of the bar stools at the island.

He slides the glass back and forth across the counter top, switching it from hand to hand. The sleeves of his jacket ride up and Malcolm catches sight of the light reflecting off of Gil’s watch face. Malcolm walks around to the other side of the island to place himself in front of Gil. He folds himself over the table until his cheek is pressed to the cool surface. Camera lens just a few inches away from Gil’s hand.

Malcolm lines up the camera so that he can see the camera in the reflection of Gil’s watch. The cut crystal of the tumbler catches the light and seems to sparkle. The amber liquid in the cup looks like liquid gold in Gil’s hands. In the background Gil is blurry and out of focus. It looks like something out of an advertisement you would see on the side of a liquor store.

_click_

Gil just smirks at Malcolm. They both know that Gil is putting on a show for Malcolm. That he is doing the most so Malcolm can get optimal pictures. Malcolm sits up so that he’s no longer laying across the island. He takes the final sip from his glass and Gil mirrors him. Malcolm sets his drink down with a start, the crystal clatters loudly against the countertop, and picks up the camera hanging from his neck.

”Don’t move.” Malcolm demands and Gil complies. Besides for a little hum in acknowledgement and the small movement of Gil swallowing, he stays still.

Gil holds the crystal up to his face using his left hand, his chest is open to Malcolm, his lips parted around the glass, and he lets the scotch pool around his mouth. When a droplet passes over his lips and into his mouth, Gil sighs and closes his eyes at the rich taste.

_click_

At the sound of the shutter Gil’s eyes fly open once more and he pushes his gaze through the viewfinder to Malcolm. Gil isn’t smiling, but his eyes crease like he is, and Malcolm blushes under the stare. Gil carefully tilts the glass down so that he can breathe through his mouth, but keeps the rim pressed against his lips.

_click_

Gil sets the glass down on the table. Malcolm waits for him to speak, but he doesn’t. Instead he keeps the heavy eye contact with Malcolm and slips his jacket off his shoulders. Malcolm inhales sharply through his mouth. Camera forgotten as Malcolm watches, enraptured as the fabric slides down Gil’s arms and is slung over his shoulder.

Malcolm is still staring at Gil, unsure of what to do. He knows he should be taking the man’s picture, but he wants to enjoy this image himself. Malcolm doesn’t want anyone else to know what it’s like to be on the other end of that gaze, to be the person that Gil is focusing all his attention on.

”Like what you see, city boy?” Gil remarks. He walks around the island and rests his hip against the edge of it, balancing himself on his hand so that the stone doesn’t dig into his bones.

”Y-yeah.” Macolm is unsure of what’s the right answer. So he tells the truth, he _does_ like what he sees. He sees Gil, giving him bedroom eyes and moving around Malcolm's apartment so comfortably as if he owns the place. But maybe that wasn’t the right answer…. Maybe Gil wants feedback on his posing. Or maybe the truth would scare Gil.

”Good.” Gil shifts slightly. Hooks one finger into the collar of his jacket and holds it over his shoulder that way. “Now take my photo.”

_click_

”Attaboy.” Gil smiles, all the heat from his eyes now gone. He stands up straight and smacks the table with his hand twice before hanging up his jacket and walking over to Malcolm’s bed. Gil turns slowly, allowing Malcolm to take in every inch of the man, while Gil takes in every inch of the apartment.

”What’re-” Malcolm’s voice cracks. “What are you doing?” Suddenly, Malcolm feels small in his own house.

”Having a photoshoot of course.” Gil sits down on the far corner of Malcolm’s bed and Malcolm’s mouth begins to water.

”Why are you all the way over there?” Malcolm knows it’s a stupid question, but he can’t think of anything else. Not with Gil resting so comfortably on the bed where Malcolm has fantasized about the older man.

”I thought a change in scenery would be good. If I’m too far, why don’t you just come to me?” Gil raises an eyebrow as Malcolm moves just a little _too_ quickly to join him near the bed.

The city lights reflect and wave along Gil’s hair as Malcolm slowly circles the bed to stand in front of Gil. Malcolm kneels to get an up angle and knows that he isn’t imagining things when he sees Gil’s tongue dart out of the corner of his mouth.

_click_

Malcolm hopes he was quick enough to get that shot. The pink of Gil’s tongue nestled neatly between his lips. The look of lust that flashes across Gil’s face. Malcolm knows that he’s one of the few people lucky enough to see it. If Malcolm was able to get that shot, he’d cherish that photo. Maybe even hide it away. A momento just for his eyes.

What’s even more is Malcolm knows he saw it. It wasn’t one of his hallucinations. He knows that Gil is feeling the same tingling sensation low in his stomach as him. Neither of them are dumb and both of them have made a living out of being able to read other people. Gil knows exactly how Malcolm feels just as much as Malcolm can tell what Gil is thinking. All the years they have spent together just builds how well they can dissect each other’s movements and thoughts. It’s just a standoff to see who will cave first.

Gil spreads his legs in a wide stance and brings his forearms to rest on his knees. Malcolm longs to know what it would feel like to be bracketed by those strong muscles. To be so close to Gil that he could smell his cologne and even just _him_. Gil leans forward and for a moment Malcolm thinks that he is leaning in for a kiss, but Gil stops moving too far back for it to be anything more than another pose.

_click_

Slowly, Gil’s hands begin to undo the tie at the base of his neck. The knot is putty between his fingers and it slides open easily. Malcolm closes his eyes and allows the image to be etched into his brain. Gil sliding his hands down either end of the tie, encircling them just tight enough to keep some tension in the fabric.

_click_

The next article of clothing that receives Gil’s attention is his dress shirt. He undoes the top button so that his collar is a little looser. He slips one finger into his shirt and rubs along his neck, getting rid of the lingering sensation of the shirt pressed against his skin. Gil goes to undo the next button, but doesn’t get a chance to before being startled by Malcolm jumping to his feet.

”Wait!” If it wasn’t for the obvious excitement in Malcolm’s voice, Gil would have thought that something was wrong. That he had pushed the boy too far.

”What?” Still, Gil can’t help but be concerned.

”This lighting is horrible.” Malcolm decrees. He drops the camera and begins to unplug the standing lamp in the living room.

”Kid, what the hell are you doing? You can just turn the lights on in here!” Gil should know that it’s better to just go along with whatever happens when Malcolm gets an idea.

”The overhead lighting will cast shadows. If i put this lamp in front of you it’ll light up your whole face. Plus, it’s a much softer light than the overheads.” Malcolm plugs the lamp in and positions it where it won’t get in his way.

”You’re the photography expert here.” Gil watches Malcolm struggle to reach the top of the lamp where the knob is.

Malcolm reaches upwards and his hand is just a few inches shy of the switch. Never one to ask for help, Malcolm tries again, thinking that if he just reaches a little bit higher he can make it. But as they say, insanity is doing the same thing twice and expecting different results. Balancing on the balls of his feet, Malcolm grips the slender pole in one hand and grabs the knob. Suddenly, Malcolm feels the hair at the base of his neck raise, just how it does when you can feel someone watching you. Malcolm imagines that Gil is unashamedly checking him out. The switch is easily within reach with Malcolm up on his toes, but the thought of Gil watching him makes his hand tremor slightly and he ends up almost knocking over the lamp. Groaning, Malcolm lowers himself back down, tilts the lamp towards him until the knob is face level, and he switches the lamp on with ease. He turns his attention back to Gil with a sheepish look.

”That’s a neat trick.” Gil remarks and he’s met with a scowl. “Oh come on. You do that everytime you need to turn that lamp on when it’s in the living room?” Gil questions, making no effort to hide his amusement.

”No.” Malcolm huffs out and then whispers, “I stand on the couch.”

Gil erupts into a fit of laughter. The mental image of Malcolm trying to settle down for a relaxing night, curled up on the couch with a book and a cup of tea but then having to move all the stuff to the coffee table so that he can stand on the couch to turn on a light. Malcolm’s sighs only make Gil laugh harder.

_click_

”I love your smile.” Malcolm says. He means it too. Gil stops laughing and looks up at Malcolm.

”Yeah?” Gil asks, his voice suddenly quiet. Malcolm nods. “I’m old now. I smile and I get wrinkles around my mouth and my eyes. I’m not as handsome as I used-”

”That’s a lie and we both know that. Gil, come on, you’re very handsome. Sure you’re in your fifties but that doesn’t make you old. You don’t qualify for the senior citizen discount, at least not for a couple more years.” Malcolm smirks and Gil softens.

”They pushed it back to sixty five. So I’ve got more than a couple of years.” Gil adds a wink at the end.

Gil gives Malcolm a small smile and stands. His body refuses to get up from the plushness of Malcolm’s bed and he grunts in disapproval when he has to use his hands to help himself up. Malcolm steps back and bumps into the lamp. He catches it before it can fall and when he looks back at Gil he feels as though all the air in the room has been vacuumed out.

The light from the lamp dances across Gil’s belt buckle. Framing either side of it are Gil’s strong hands. Gil is in what Malcolm likes to call, his officer stance. Shoulders and hips squared, chest puffed out, and his hands gripping onto his belt. He looks powerful and boy does Malcolm’s mind begin to wander. How strong is Gil in bed? Is he the type to be demanding or is he a careful lover? Enjoying how he can take his partner apart.

_click_

Slowly, the unspoken tension returns to the room. Malcolm’s thoughts darkening his eyes and Gil catching on quickly. Gil remembers what he was doing earlier and unbuttons his shirt quickly, giving Malcolm no time to interrupt him again.

_click_

Being an officer, Gil always needed to stay fit, but now that he’s older and a lieutenant, working out has been less of a necessity and more of a pastime. Not that it means that Gil is out of shape, because he’s not, and Malcolm doesn’t care one way or another. All he cares about is how he can get Gil’s bare chest pressed against him. Malcolm can’t help but to giggle out of nerves. Both him and Gil know what’s happening here, what they _want_ to happen here.

The sound of leather sliding through Gil’s belt loops sounds like a roar compared to the quiet of the room. Or maybe it’s the roar of Malcolm’s heart racing, bloop pumping through his veins at an alarming speed and echoing in his ears. Gil twists this way and that, removing the belt until he is finally free of it.

The two of them stand there watching each other. Waiting for the other man to make the first move. Both of them too scared of rejection and ruining what they already have. Malcolm is the first to look away, but Gil doesn’t back down. He knows what he wants and he’s ready to risk it all. Malcolm clears his throat and looks back at Gil after giving him what Malcolm thinks is more than enough time to recede back into their dance. Tiptoeing around their emotions and each other.

However, Gil is tired of the dance. He knows how it goes. He’d done it years ago with Jackie and here he is doing it again with Malcolm. Gil tilts his head, begging for Malcolm to come closer, to stop resisting. Gil’s chest and emotions are bared for Malcolm to see. They both know how they would look to others, but that’s not enough to scare Gil away. He wants Malcolm, he loves him. Gil tries his best to let every emotion show on his face, hoping that Malcolm will finally get the reassurance that he needs. Instead, Malcolm raises the camera, creating a physical barrier between him and the man he wants.

_click_

”Malcolm,” Gil's voice drops and Malcolm’s stomach does a flip when he hears his name roll off Gil’s tongue. “Come to me.” It sounds like a command, but Malcolm knows that Gil means it as a plea. Malcolm’s never heard Gil ask for something before, didn’t think that he was capable of begging.

”I can’t.” It’s the truth. Malcolm is frozen where he stands. His breathing is harsh and he can feel his chest rising and falling, but he can’t tear his eyes from Gil. “I want to, but I just can’t.”

”That’s alright then, baby. I’ll just come to you.” Gil says so gently that Malcolm has to close his eyes. Gil has always been gentle with him. Taking care of him. Malcolm swallows down the lump in his throat and nods.

Gil steps forward, twisting one end of the tie around his hand and slipping it off from where it was hanging around his neck. Without thinking, Gil loops the tie around itself into an “S” like shape.

_click_

The next thing Malcolm knows, Gil is directly in front of him. Looming over him. Crowding into his space. Malcolm can smell the scotch on Gil’s breath and his cologne on his neck. And it’s nowhere enough, but still too much all at once. Malcolm longs to be wrapped up in Gil’s arms, to have the older man protect him in every way he can. Malcolm wants to fall into Gil’s chest and learn every inch of his body. He wants Gil to have to wear turtlenecks for days to cover what Malcolm wants to do to him. Malcolm doesn’t do any of that. Malcolm runs.

”I should develop these pictures.” Malcolm yells, refusing to look back at Gil. Malcolm runs up the stairs to his office.

Gil looks at the empty space where Malcolm was just standing. He doesn’t know what he did wrong. He gave Malcolm the space he needed and he got an okay back from Malcolm. He redoes a few of the buttons on his shirt and makes his way up the stairs. All the less than indecent emotions Gil had been feeling are quickly replaced with concern, embarrassment, and a bit of regret that he pushed Malcolm too far too fast.

”Malcolm?” Gil calls and knocks on the closed office door. When he doesn’t get a response Gil knocks again, hoping that Malcolm will open the door, throw his arms around Gil’s neck, and finally give in and kiss him. Still no answer. Cautiously, Gil opens the door into the office.

”Shit! WIll you shut that?” Malcolm snaps as light floods the office converted into a dark room.

”Right. Sorry.” Gil closes the door. He leans against it and tilts his head back. “Malcolm, I’m sorry.”

”Gil, it’s fine. You didn’t ruin the pictures.” Malcolm won’t look at him. Gil winces.

”I’m glad the photos are okay, but that wasn’t what I was apologizing for.” Gil walks up to Malcolm, his head hanging. “I made you uncomfortable. That’s not okay. Even though we both are adults and we both want this, whatever this is. Maybe in the heat of the moment it was too much and I’m sorry I overstepped. I never want to do anything to hurt you, kid.”

”I do want this.” Malcolm finally places the camera down and looks up from his hands. “I know you would never do anything to hurt me, but that doesn’t mean I won’t do something to hurt you. And before you say that it’s not possible, I know that it is. We could be in bed and I’ll have a night terror and I could hit you. I have issues, Gil, you were there the night it all started. I can’t promise that I’ll be a good partner. That I won’t get suspicious, clingy, or demanding. Gil, we both know too much about each other. We have years worth of artillery to use against each other. It’s safer for you if we just keep things the way they are. I’ll continue to cast longing glances at you and you can continue to pretend that you don’t see them.” Tears form in Malcolm’s eyes.

”Mal,” Gil cups Malcolm’s cheek, “you can’t be the one to decide if I get hurt or not. I’d go to hell for you kid. Even if you’re the one who puts me through hell, I’d stay there, and fight my way out for you. Even if I do that just for it to happen again and again. I’d do anything for you.”

”I’m not worth the fight.” Malcolm wraps his hand around Gil’s, removing it from his face.

”That’s where you’re wrong. You’re a fighter, Mal. You deserve someone who will fight for you.” Gil whispers.

The only light in the room is the dim red glow of a single light bulb. The whole room is drenched in a thick blanket of crimson. The light is sticky and saturated and it fuels them. Gil slides his wrist through Malcolm’s grasp until they’re holding hands. The color swarming the room from the light gets rid of any visible blush on either of their faces, but they can still feel the heat on their cheeks. Gil leads Malcolm around the desk by his hand and pulls Malcolm into his chest. The red light pervades every aspect of Gil’s mind. It calls forward all the anger he feels for the people who mistreated Malcolm. It multiplies the love he feels for him.

But at this moment, what Gil and Malcolm feel the most, is the atmosphere that the red light sets. It’s heavy and it’s sexy, and it amplifies all the feelings they’ve tried so hard to suppress. With the cloak of red and the objects of Malcolm’s love and hate scattered around the office with the two of them at the center, Gil feels as though he is standing inside Malcolm’s heart. Gil places his hand on Malcolm’s cheek once more and Malcolm leans into the touch.

”Kiss me.” Malcolm breathes out. Gil breathes those words in.

Finally, their lips meet. They’re in no rush to move things back downstairs. Both of them taking their time to explore the other man’s mouth. Malcolm steps closer to Gil, pressing himself against Gil’s thigh. Gil slides a hand down Malcolm’s back and into the back pocket of Malcolm’s slacks. Gil enjoys how supple Malcolm is for a few moments longer before he breaks the kiss.

”What do you want, kid?” Gil asks. He doesn’t mean the question sexually. He wants to figure out what pace Malcolm is willing to go at. Either Malcolm misses the question completely or doesn’t care to answer because he pushes Gil backwards into the wall. His hands come up to grip Gil’s unbuttoned collar and drags Gil’s face back to his once more.

”You. Always you.”

**Author's Note:**

> I don't plan on following this up because I really just wanted to focus on the tension of the photoshoot and the confession in the dark room. Special thanks to the [PSon Trash Server](https://discord.gg/pKV3cZe) for all the info on photography <3


End file.
